Welcome to The Gen-X Journals
Grab your midlife magnifying glass and join me in the analog closet (Seven Minutes In Heaven optional) to figure out how much we've changed and where the F we're going.
Hey, friends!
It’s me, Alexa Joy Sherman Young (multiple names for multiple personalities), coming at you live from Encino.
Why Am I Here?
I mean, does anybody really know? And if so, can you please share it with the class?
Okay, for these Substackian purposes: Although I’ve spent most of my career in publishing as an author, editor, and journalist, it was while digging through old boxes after both parents were dead (can we talk about adult orphanhood?) that I unearthed some of the more compelling writing in my repertoire: Diaries, handcrafted comic strips (inspired by Betty and Veronica, of course), love letters, and endless school assignments.
A lot of the material didn’t make for easy reading at first. So much angst over boys I didn’t even know, and OMG the agony of being a virgin well into my twenties! Truth told, I burned some of it in my thirties after becoming a wife and mom (go figure): Whole chapters of my life, fed to the flames in some frantic attempt to erase the shame of who I perceived myself to have been. Like, if the pages didn’t exist then neither did my most embarrassing moments, right?
I now regret cremating that shit and wish I’d saved every word. But at least some of the sex stuff was quasi-documented in my first published book (yay?):
The good news is I didn’t burn it all. And once I stopped cringing and started looking at things through more progressive lenses (don’t you love a double entendre?), something unexpected happened: I saw myself. Not the person I thought I’d become, as defined by the roles I’ve played for most of my adult life, but the person I’ve always been: Complicated and confused, sure, but also someone I could — and probably should — love.
Especially when I silenced my inner critic and stopped wearing the masks I thought were part of the upwardly mobile dress code.
And therein lies the midlife mindfuck. It’s a lot to unpack, especially as a perimenopausal empty-nester trying to figure out WTF comes next.
How About You?
Perhaps you’re grappling with similar existential conundrums (not to be confused with crises … we shall not call them crises!) — especially if you’re Gen-X. Maybe you, too, were raised to believe you could have it all, and you damn well better pursue it all, even if it meant losing yourself in the process.
I’m also guessing hoping you have a few bodies buried in your proverbial basement. Yes, I know it’s easy to be #grateful that social media and reality TV didn’t exist way back when to enable your mass public humiliation. But are you really that relieved?
Or are you maybe, just maybe, looking back and appreciating who you once were? Perhaps you’re even starting to realize that the more you’ve changed, the more you’ve stayed the same — and so long as you’ve evolved in the ways that matter, that’s not such a bad thing.
Could it be that you were always enough, and now it’s time to embrace that person, once and for all? To dismantle the bullshit you built around yourself in order to survive in a world that demands way too many of the wrong things?
What’s The Plan?
The Gen-X Journals is a space where we can take an unflinching look at who we used to be and who we’re becoming … or perhaps unbecoming. Expect personal essays, cultural reckoning, and the kind of honesty that comes from having nothing left to prove. No shame, tons of support for my fellow Midstackers in particular, and the occasional deep dive into a song you forgot you knew all the lyrics to. (I worked in the music business for the better part of the 90s, so there’ll be lots of fun stuff from that era.)
If you’re game, consider this an invitation to share some memories of your own. (Like, here’s one idea for future posts: What was your first concert? Have you seen them since? Compare/contrast!)
My inbox is always open and I read every message. So, please K.I.T. and let’s get this party started.
My first concert was IM SO GLAD YOURE HERE!!!!
I’m moving to a smaller home in a different country, and over the next two weeks I’m going to be choosing what goes with me and what goes to the landfill. You have inspired me to save stuff.